55 degrees and cloudy in June

I am NOT complaining about the weather, but I will complain about the air conditioning. Yesterday it was in the 90s and the air at work was on full blast. I started to shiver.

I would have been warmer in winter.

Today is nice, tho. It’s rainy and dreary and, well, let’s face it, perfect for me. Doom and gloom, that’s me! And loving every minute of it. I love being wrapped up in my comfy sweater, but I’m at the coffee shop, not at work. I can relax and be comfortable here. At the library, I need to be on my feet when a patron calls, which means I am constantly on my feet-and, no, I wasn’t able to warm up with all the moving around.

I don’t like having to go out into 90 degree weather just to warm up. Things should be regulated! So, yes! I am complaining about the artificial weather!

But the coffee is warm, and the rain is outside. I just wish I was able to stay in bed yesterday when the thunder started booming. It’s like plugging in for me, recharging. Lightning energizes the air I breathe. I am transformed.

So what will I write about today? I will write about the fact that I love Thursdays. I especially love gloomy Thursdays. Never mind that I have to make my appointments with doctors and specialists on Thursdays, it’s MY day. It’s my day away from everyone, and everything. Besides the few hours I have to give someone else for my own benefit, I can do what I want. I can sleep in, I can go to the coffee shop and write. I don’t have to wish for rain on Thursdays. Every Thursday, it rains just for me. (See previous post…)

Last week when I was on vacation, I realized how much Thursdays mean to me. I wasn’t able to have MY Thursday. Mind you, I felt like leaving Craig at the camper and just hang out at the coffee shop to write, but I didn’t. And as much as I love hanging out with Craig, it just didn’t feel right. It wasn’t really Thursday to me. I’m sure if I asked him if I could go and have my Thursday, he wouldn’t have minded-too much. But I chose not to. Now I know, that I have to. I have to take my Thursdays. Like the lightning, it refreshes me, recharges me, rejuvenates me. I feel more like myself, the self I have to oppress at the library. I’m still amazed at how one does that. I don’t do that very well. My mouth always gets me into trouble!

Here I can be mouthy and I don’t give a crap at what anyone thinks about it. And you know what? I like being mouthy. As a kid I was so painfully shy that it really was, physically painful. I couldn’t open my mouth. Up until just a few years ago I shook if I had to speak in public. Now, I shake a little, but not as much. I can usually rely on my mouth to get a laugh out of someone, and that makes me happy like you wouldn’t believe. If I can’t make someone laugh, or at least smile, I know I’ve fucked up.

I suppose that’s why writing is important to me as well. I can write down what my mouth would like to say but can’t. So I blog it. And if you like it, awesome. And if you don’t, suck it, bitches!


One response to “55 degrees and cloudy in June

  1. Edith Bahringer

    Whew….I’m so glad that I like your writing. Just to let you know…the leaf doesn’t fall to far from the tree!!! dito..dito…. 🙂

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